Afraid knot

Have you ever tried to get a knot out of your favorite necklace? You decide you can do it and 1 hour later not only have you not made any progress but you have now added two more knots to the already existing ones? Bound and determined to figure this out you get a needle, yes a needle in hopes that you can figure out this knot dilemma. Sometimes you succeed and other times you throw out the necklace and get a new one. There are knots in my life right now. Health knots that create anxiety knots. Self worth knots that create spiritual knots. Not being able to meet obligation knots that create frustration knots ... oh the list goes on. My usual "needle trick" isn't working on the knots in my life. What I have learned is that in the necklace knot dilemma it's okay to set it down for a time or to ask for a fresh set of eyes or just trash it all together. While I can't just dump my health issues in the trash, although that sounds easier than going through it, I can find a better way to help me untangle. It's hard when you can't find the courage you need or the strength to ask for help. It's hard to feel like a burden or afraid of your knots. I pray for the courage to get through my knots and knowledge to understand why.

The other man ...

True there is another man in my life and although he will never take the place of my sweet husband he is running a close race in stealing my heart. No No Bean's I would like to give some fun facts about who you are at 2 years of age:

• You love to go and go and go ... "a go to work" "a go to sissy" a go to store" " a go out" all day long you want to "a go"
• Shoes... major fashion accessory in your world, they are the first thing on and the last thing off. Honestly I think you can go without clothes but not without shoes. We try our best to keep you out of girls shoes but you don't care a shoe is a shoe.
• Car's! Oh the obsession has started early, I would not be the least bit surprised if one day you had a vintage car collection. Oh and every car is named McQueen it seems.
• Huggies, not to be confused with the diaper brand. You love to give huggies and the best ones too! You are my affectionate little man with lots of love to give.
• No mean yes, literally it does. Noah do you want chocolate? No. Noah do you want milk? No. Noah do you want to play? No. All answers point to No however you mean yes.
• Kicking and Screaming a talent in which you inherited from your father according to Grammy. Hell hath no fury like a toddler scorned. You throw your tantrums well I must say, strategically and ever so carefully placing your self on the floor and then the big production. Bravo son, Bravo. Hopefully you will out grown them as your father did and not your mother.
• Your gifts according to mom: Laughter, love, smiles, determination, unafraid and silliness.

Happy Birthday Noah, every day is a great day to be you and be with you!

I wonder what life will be like for my kids when they are 15, 20, 30, 40 .... as much as I would love to hand pick life for them I realize that is not how it works or should work. So if I may here is a list of "I would like" suggestions for my children in no particular order :

I would like for you to ...

• Say I learned to golf on my dads clubs now they are yours to learn on son
• Date, date, date it is so much fun date!! No serious one person in high school
• Grace~ Don't be afraid to have lots of girl friends from what I hear they can be fun to have
• Have a strong sense that GOD'S side is always your best option
• For you to tell your children that you played with these toys and read these books
• Love The Beatles, Michael Jackson, Johnny Cash and Neil Diamond as much as I do
• Give your first born your mothers wedding ring for their sweetie
• Know that the term "Mother in law" doesn't have to scare you, stress you out or overwhelm you.
• Know the thrill of going to college to learn more, to learn to become your own person and to be free of mom & dad ... kinda.
• (Noah) go on a mission forget yourself for awhile.
• (Gracie) get married after 23 wait a few years to have babies & just enjoy your spouse. I am bending on 23 realistically I would say 24/25 you wont be a spinster I promise.
• (Noah) play High School sports
• Learn to sew, both of you even if its just a button or stitch
• Learn to cook something other than top ramen and mac and cheese
• Save hard earned , summer job money to put down on your first car "the beater"
• Play the Piano, guitar, flute I don't care choose one and play it
• Say I slept in this crib now my babies do
• Say I was blessed in this dress too
• Travel a ton see the world not just your backyard
• Love your parents, we love you.
• (Gracie) a special note, one day you will want to meet your birth mom I hope we can do this together and that it is a sweet reunion for us both.
• Learn another language no pig Latin does not qualify.
• Love breakfast for dinner from time to time

I am sure I will be adding to this list as my kids grow ,maybe even deleting a few as I grow too.

The Proper Care & Feeding of Husbands

What is the proper care of a husband?

Are men really that standard that most rules apply to all?

Can they really be that simple?

A friend of mine read the book "the proper care and feeding of husbands" awhile back and as she was reading it She said and i quote~ "I had to hide it so that my husband wouldn't be on to me or get any funny ideas." I decided to read this book and I find myself doing the same as my friend:

• hiding the book in the closet
• placing the book face down so he doesn't see it
• read in the bathroom with the door closed, etc. gulp

I must admit that 31 pages into this book I have found myself nodding my head agreeing with most of what is written. Double gulp! Am I more conservative that I have been leading myself to believe? Or perhaps I see a lot of what I do or don't do for my own.

One comment sort of hit home with me and I want to share it with my married friends and family out there in hopes it will challenge them:

"they (wives) run around in mother attire all the time rather than what they used to when they were out fishing for "father" and this continual visual turns most men off or pushes them elsewhere ... Not only do many wives look like mother most of the time, they move about the home constantly in mother mode: barking out orders, directing traffic, and beating the family drum. While this is all well and good, they forget to slip into wife mode, woman mode, lover mode, companion mode during private moments with their husbands."

How many times have you complained that your honey brings his work home with him both in briefcase and head? Likewise for us wives/mother. We should not always be obsessed with our "domestic duties" and "mundane issues" that we fail to reconnect at the end of our mutually challenging and tiring day with the man we chose. I am sure it is frustrating for a man to to deal with the double standard that only takes into account our immediate needs and desires. Would it kill us to step it up a notch? Lets try a little and see how many of us kill over in our efforts.

God's greatest gift, after life itself is love. God created my husband for me and me for him. Love eachother with all your heart and treat eachother like the gift from god we are.

One Year Later ...

If pictures are worth a thousand words, than I need not say a thing.

Happy Birthday Noah " No-No Beans" Russell Hymas!!

Family Feud ... Not a game

CAUTION: Today is a day filled with family nonsense. Pardon my soap box, I need this as a reference.

I wish I could say my family feuds mirrored that of the game show, you know:

• "Name an animal with three letters in its name."
• "Name a brand of gasoline."
• "Name something you would find in the fridge."

Nope, my family feuds consist of :

• "Why does dad stay in relationships he clearly isn't happy with?" or
• "Why can't we all be in a room without someone getting irritated?"

The list goes on without giving up too much personal details. I have been mulling this over for some time now and after all these years (and today in paticular) I still have no real answer. Is mine the only disfunctional family? No! Are there worse families out there? Yes! However, it still makes me ponder why families have the issues they do. And how do you turn a happy face to the drama. Is it possible to do that?

To be honest with you, I am considering a sabbatical from all family interaction for awhile. I have seen families who function on all cylinders and it is facinating to me. Thank you Aunt Sue and Aunt Nancy for the amazing example in families!!

With all that my family has been through you would honestly think that we would see life is short and has no time for silly pettiness. After all, with two major divorces, death of a child, one child critically injured you, would think by now we would understand the importance of being close and staying close.

With all this in mind, I have come to realize that this is my trial and test, perhaps I am to be the one that makes everyone see the better in the other and perhaps this is my warning from God saying keep your OWN family on the right path or this to shall be your inheritance. Nevertheless, I love my family faults and all but it sure would make life better if we could just get along.

So if you have family struggles remember:

"There is a divine purpose in the adversities we encounter every day. They prepare, they purge, they purify, and thus they bless."--James E. Faust, "The Refiner's Fire," Ensign, May 1979, 53

& ...

"No matter what circumstances you sisters experience, your influence can be marvelously far-reaching. I believe some of you have a tendency to underestimate your profound capacity for blessing the lives of others. More often than not, it is not on the stage with some public pronouncement but in your example of righteousness and the countless gentle acts of love and kindness done so willingly, so often on a one-to-one basis."--James E. Faust, "You Are All Heaven Sent," Ensign, Nov. 2002, 110

Oh ... and read http://www.usna.edu/LDSSA/Resource%20File/Notwithstanding%20My%20Weakness.doc

By the by, this excludes my in-laws ... this really is my own family.

An Ode to my Five year old, Grace

Today my little lady is less little.
Today my little baby tells me she is not a baby anymore. Today my little bundle walks next to me.
Today my little lady is five.

I am reminded daily that she is strong and sensitive.
Bold and precocious.
Sassy but sweet.
Artistic and imaginative.
Beautifully crafted by her father in heaven.

Please allow the next five years to go a bit slower
Knowing that my love for you is never ending.
You bring a smile to my face Grace Ann.
Happy Birthday

In her lifetime, Grace would love to ...

• Marry Garrett Whitton
• Get married in the snow
• Have her own cooking show
• Never die
• Have a sister (she doesn't think a sister will pull her hair)
• Have a bunk bed (that is why she needs a sister if we are being honest)
• Have a dog (when she moves out hopefully)
• Dance a lot
• See Jaydn Boyce move to Utah ("I miss her so much mommy")
• Visit Livemore, CA
• Wants to get baptized at 8 by her dad
• Wants to be a girl scout NOW (she can't wait till she is 6 to do so)
• Wants her own house to run around in (mommy shares this dream with her too)
• Learn to play the piano

Getting to know you ...

This is Noah, affectionately known as "Beans" around here. He is this big chubby, smiley baby that has expanded our hearts yet again!! I always heard women brag about their chunky babies and now I have one. Have you ever seen man boobies on a baby before? Well now you have. Preemie? You would never know.

If beans could talk I think these are a few things he would share with the world:

• My big sis is the cat's meow, she is by far the funniest and most caring sister on planet earth
  
• Daddy is the coolest, especially when he sings "Pants on the Ground" to me
• Everyone says I look like my daddy with the exception of my chin, it is totally mommy
  
• Mommy saves me from blanket attacks a lot
• Nap? I don't need no stinking nap.
• I have spitting up down to an art form. Burp cloth, please.
  
• I like talking to my Grammy, she keeps up conversation well
  
• Balloons are seriously funny business
• Morning poops are the bomb, literally. Oh, and the best place to poop is at the dinner table
  
• Tummy time is the worst and every baby should be exempt from having to do so
• Car rides are for babies that take naps and I don't nap so therefore I hate car rides
• Who is next to cuddle me?

Beans, you are the best and we love every ounce of you.

"If you are not happy, you are not grateful"


"Remember to be gentle with yourself and others...none can say why some fields will blossom while others lay brown beneath the August sun. Care for those around you. Look past your differences. Their dreams are no less than yours, their choices no more easily made. And give, give in any way you can, of whatever you posses. To give is to love. To withhold is to wither. Care less for your harvest than for how it is shared and your life will have meaning and your heart will have peace."


{KEN NERBURN}

The Goodbyes Begin

Gracie finished up her last day at All Saints Preschool last week. She loves preschool, and her teacher Mrs. Preston in particular. So she insisted on painting a ceramic cup for her at Color Me Mine (which looks eerily similar to the chalice on Indiana Jones), and writing her this cute note...



Ahh ... the sad goodbyes begin. Pretty soon we're going to have to take our final trip to Phil's BBQ. Que triste!

Today's Conversations

CONVERSATION #1:

Grace: "Mommy, how come No-No Beans doesn't have tears?"
Mommy: "I don't think his eyes can produce tears yet, baby."
Grace: "Mommy, I know! Maybe his nose produces tears that projects them to his eyes!"

What four year old says "projects"?

CONVERSATION #2:

Grace: "Mommy, can we play Mama Mia music?"
Mommy: "Yes, what would you like to hear?"
Grace: "Lay all your love on me, except when we do the hand motions, be sure to point to me so that you lay all your love on me and not on you because I am your daughter."

My Gracie girl you crack me up, thanks for keeping life light for me!

Stay Classy, San Diego

Dear Sunny, Beautiful City of San Diego:

Thanks for giving Russ and me some of the best times in our lives together here -- law school, babies, beaches, the sun ... You name it, we have had a blast these last nine years with you. It is with bitter sweet emotion that I am writing this letter to inform you that we must part ways and move on with our lives, it is us not you. Russ and I have been offered an opportunity too wonderful to pass up, so we will be packing up our belongings at the end of the year to head north to Utah's saltiest city. We recognize all that we are giving up here, but also realize all we are gaining by moving there: grandparents, affordable homes, four seasons, Utes football, the mountains, only one major freeway, good eats (e.g., Training Table & Hires), and city streets you don't have to mapquest to get around in -- just to name a few.

We will miss your sunshine 350 days a year, your beautiful beaches, the Chargers, flip-flops year round, Uncle Phil & his famous BBQ, your diversity (both in terms of people and culture), the ability to go to the snow and sunny beaches all in one day, your "Disneyland" temple, and last but certainly not least, the amazing friends who somehow became family as we have lived away from ours. In our eyes, you certainly live up to your nickname, "America's Finest City."

Thanks for being a kind city and giving us so many great years and memories to remember. We started our lives together with you, and you've left a permanent imprint on our hearts.

With much love and gratitude,
The Hymii's

OCTOBER

October was a fun, busy month. Papa came to meet Noah for the first time and brought Uncle Tanner, who made cheesecakes with Grace (baking is her favorite!) and helped her carve a pumpkin that only lasted four days. Who knew pumpkins only lasted that long? Uncle Tanner is the best for entertaining Grace and taking all her tall orders with a grain of salt.

We journeyed up north to the best pumpkin patch we have ever seen -- Bates Nut Farm. Grace rode a pony named "Star" which she thought was pretty cool since her bestest bud's middle name is Starr.

Trick-or-treating was a blast, as always. We went with our usual fun party ~ the Binghams and Uncle Stevers' clan. Trick-or-treating almost didn't happen; Miss Grace got a tummy ache hours before and was throwing up as if she were auditioning for the lead role in The Exorcist -- ugh. Finally, at the last minute she got this burst of energy and was ready to party like a mermaid should. Daddy was "Dog the Bounty Hunter." Sorry, no pics of Daddy. I am waiting for some to come my way.

Noah, better known as "No-No Beans" around our house, is growing like a weed but a cute weed. He is a good baby who sleeps a lot so far and grunts like no baby we have ever heard.

All in all, life is grand around here!

Gas or Happiness? I say Happiness!